RTFC

Or, why paying attention matters, part 7.

One of these days I should just outline the basic rules any Magic player ought to keep in mind but one of them, perhaps the most important one, is going to be: Read (and comprehend) The Fucking Card.

Here's the situation:

I'm playing the updated version of Zx-no Jin-Gitaxis, Teferi back in, Venser for extra bounce, no Oona's Grace yet. C is playing W/B weenie/lifegain with Ajani Goldmage to back them up, and stonethorn who's got a U/B Tezzerit deck. They've been gaining life while picking on each other, so I'm still at 20 but they're in the 40s.

I'm doing a whole lot of nothing except preparing to go off, C is stuck on two lands and stonethorn has three Wurmcoil Engines in play (an OG one and two Phyrexian Metamorphs copying it), Tezzerit, Tumble Magnet and Torpor Orb.

But I've got everything in hand. Teferi on board, Venser in hand, Walk the Aeons, Life From the Loam; everything is ready to go.

So I start to go off. I think I've got it. I can take infinite turns, create more creatures, use Venser to bounce what I don't like and Loaming Shaman to keep from decking myself.

Gleefully ignoring Torpor Orb.

So I begin to show the combo, it can't be stopped and yeah my library is dwindling down but I can basically swing through C's defenses and yeah I'll lose a creature a turn when I hit stonethorn but since I can Loam my stuff back I'll never get-

TORPOR ORB

And it's at this point that C points out to me that my enter the battlefield triggers don't happen.

Just like that, it's over. My brain melts down and instead of even trying to play kingmaker or mess with someone or find a way out, I decide to deck myself in order to deprive my opponents from killing me.

Now my disappointment comes not from not being able to answer Torpor Orb. My issue is that 1) I didn't comprehend the situation correctly and 2) I mentally bailed when I understood what was happening.

I read Torpor Orb. It was read aloud to the group. But what it did just wouldn't sink in until it was too late, so instead of trying to plan for an inevitable win against the card that was keeping me down, or trying to even make a plan I just blithely went with plan A because 'Hey, I've got it, and that's cooooool.'

No. Not so much.

I could have taken a few extra turns to work out my position, I could have given some of those turns to C to make stonethorn's boardstate untenable, or at least vulnerable enough that Torpor Orb didn't matter. I could have worked my way out of it.

But I didn't, because I didn't read the card.

Read-and comprehend-the fucking card.