The Retired: Weapons of Mass Distortion

Once upon a time, I named a deck after a Crystal Method song and tried to use Defense of the Heart. 

Weapons of Mass Distortion

2 Darksteel Ingot

4 Utopia Tree
3 Varchild's War-Riders
1 Kiki-Jiki, Mirror Breaker
3 Viridian Zealot
1 Tornado Elemental
1 Bringer of the Blue Dawn
1 Bringer of the Red Dawn
1 Duplicant
1 Akroma, Angel of Fury
1 Avatar of Fury
1 Avatar of Might
1 Woodfall Primus
1 Bogardan Hellkite
2 Fire Ants
1 Suture Priest

4 Defense of the Heart

4 Lat-Nam's Legacy
4 Simoon

4 Forbidden Orchard
8 Forest
2 Island
5 Mountain
4 Dreamroot Cascade

As ideas go, this isn't too bad-use Forbidden Orchard to force the conditions that Defense of the Heart requires onto my opponent. Then dial up whatever cool monsters I want/need and win. Use Simoon and Fire Ants to keep the token army from getting out of control-or don't and use Suture Priest to punish them.

There are a few problems though. First, the monster selection is bad. Sure, Avatar of Might seemed rad once, but creatures have come a looooooooooong way. 

Second: the mana is all over the place. 

Third, there's no way to ensure that I'm going to get the Defense of the Heart. Lat-Lam's Legacy is a card I love and I think it's underutilized but that isn't enough to make the deck consistent. 

However, there's another reason why I'm taking this apart and it's got a little bit to do with this. (The bones of this deck went into Blackened Disease!)